Tuesday, December 29, 2009

i also, shall talk of mr. darcy.

i think he's the type of guy who is an a-hole until you get to know him. because some people are just like that.
the end!!!

Monday, December 28, 2009

to do:

1. apply for a music scholarship
2. work at bargain books
3. get voice lessons for said scholarship
4. sing at miss rozeboom's wedding

sorry that was kind of for me. haha.

Saturday, December 26, 2009


Mom: "Guess what the best part of going away is?"
Me: "What?"
Mom: "Coming home."
Me: "Ha ha. Word."

Mom wins the eloquence award on this one.

That's not all i have to say about my time away... really. I had some good deep talks with my sister, a few laughs with my brother, and perhaps more of an understanding for my dad and his family.

A frustration with sitting.
And aunts i never see.
And the cousins i don't really have a chance to know.
And a new-found ability of bowling. 5 strikes baby. Cause that's cool...

Sunday, December 20, 2009


how is it fair that someone has that control? to take your heart and make it jump, or just break it in pieces. we trust. sometimes it works, other times, not. and we watch each other crumble, as we gather the pieces and try to mash them together again. gingerly, we hand our hearts to others... each time, gambling with everything that we are. why do we do that? and how can we be so insensitive with each other's hearts, knowing full well what it is like to be broken.
new years resolution: have some respect for other people's feelings. because we get hurt, and

Friday, December 18, 2009

take your money.

i like the word eclectic.
a little bit of everything
and anything,
all put into a jar.
maybe me.
like hundreds of coins
waiting to be dollars,
in a tin from my favorite place.
making a jingle every time i need a quarter, or a nickel...
perhaps a dime. but shh!
don't make a sound...
heaven forbid there be a ring
that someone else cannot have.
or lost,
which only adds to the appeal.
so i will remain
for only a few months more.
then i leave
with all my quarters and secrets
that i have chosen not to share
with people
like you.

*note of irony: as i was about to title this post, paper planes by MIA came on. coincidence?? i think not.*

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

people, not things.

the week has ended. now things will start to be better, and i can begin to be. maybe it is a two week curse... this thursday will be pretty bad. there are some people who make it better. close friends... something more. thank God for that.
i just hope that although i have been a neglectful child that he will bless my new beginnings and perhaps some happy endings. i just got a reeeeeally fruity image of a rainbow. haha.
sometimes i am serious, sometimes i am not. in between, i'm usually tuned out. lost in thought.. worrying about something i want, or want to fix. dah. it is tiring, this whole human thing.

Friday, December 11, 2009

hate it, love it.

this is yet another one of those times where i want to make an ultimatum, and say something that really means a lot, but i can't. because i know that i will change my mind tomorrow. or in two minutes.

Wednesday, December 9, 2009

cruel world, funny world.

this made me laugh out loud.... no joke.


i am a cruel person. but this is what the world is like for too many wonderful boys and girls... i laugh at truth? or do i recognize this cartoon in myself? hmm. it's still funny.

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

they get it more than i do.

i just really like the music from up. and i have been spreading it around. it's just so good.
that and other songs on repeat in my life:

"Married Life" from Up.

"Oh, Darling" by The Beatles

"Here Comes The Sun" by The Beatles

"The Call" by Regina Spektor

Friday, December 4, 2009

apathy, my friends...

right now, i feel like someone is sitting on me; i'm too tired to push them off. strangely, i'd rather be suffocated than put forth a little effort to shove, or even roll over.

Thursday, December 3, 2009


i hate how i have to talk about things to feel better about them. sometimes things are just better kept on the inside...